Hi all,
Checking in to show that I haven't fallen off the bandwagon, though I've eaten more than I'd like this weekend. My friend has come up to visit me, so I did not fast on Sunday, by my eating seems to be falling into these patterns quite naturally. I fasted on Friday without meaning to. By the time I'd eaten my first meal, it was 8, which is the time I usually break/start my fast. Haven't really had a lot of time to check my weight, because I've been staying at my squeeze's dorm, and he doesn't have a scale. I think it will be okay.
Most of what I've had to eat this weekend has been crap. Chinese food on Friday, Pizza on other days, chips, nachos. . . Just awful things that are not good for you. I'm sure my daily intake on each day hasn't exceeded more than 2500 cal. Just rounding up, to prepare for the shock of potential gained weight. But, hey, this is a lifestyle, right? Just keep going and eventually it will be a habit.
Monday, February 20, 2012
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Normal Day 4
11:43PM
Didn't take my weight today, probably won't have time to take it tomorrow, so you lucky geese will have to wait until Friday morning, along with me. . .
Today was kind of healthy?
Had Au Bon Pain for lunch, so, a cheese bread stick, a bottle of juice and a bowl of tomato soup came to around 700 cal. Then dinner was a grilled chicken sandwich and chocolate milk at another 700. Wow, rounding up makes it look like all my meals are the same. So, about 1400 cal for the day.
Mood was a lot better today than yesterday. Still not sure if it is the diet or the period. I think I need to test it longer. Tomorrow is a fasting day. Hooray?
Gwen
Didn't take my weight today, probably won't have time to take it tomorrow, so you lucky geese will have to wait until Friday morning, along with me. . .
Today was kind of healthy?
Had Au Bon Pain for lunch, so, a cheese bread stick, a bottle of juice and a bowl of tomato soup came to around 700 cal. Then dinner was a grilled chicken sandwich and chocolate milk at another 700. Wow, rounding up makes it look like all my meals are the same. So, about 1400 cal for the day.
Mood was a lot better today than yesterday. Still not sure if it is the diet or the period. I think I need to test it longer. Tomorrow is a fasting day. Hooray?
Gwen
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Fasting Day - 3
11AM: Weight - 110 lbs
6:52 PM: Not really surprising that the scale today was heavier; I've heard that it normally is after a day of eating. Today wasn't really hard. I have a loaded schedule on Tuesdays and Thursdays which really doesn't allow for lunch, and I wake up too late for breakfast before I have to rush off to class, so it's not terribly different from my normal schedule.
Also, Valentine's Day today -Yay! The boy and I are long distance at the moment because we go to different Universities, so we'll be buying ourselves chocolate and showing each other/eating it over Skype. I guess it may sound ridiculous to normal people, but I'm looking forward to it a lot. I know just what I want to get - there are these Kinder hippos with marshmallow at our local food court thing, so, yum! Not sure what's on the menu for tonight, but I'll try to make it reasonable.
Gwen
6:52 PM: Not really surprising that the scale today was heavier; I've heard that it normally is after a day of eating. Today wasn't really hard. I have a loaded schedule on Tuesdays and Thursdays which really doesn't allow for lunch, and I wake up too late for breakfast before I have to rush off to class, so it's not terribly different from my normal schedule.
Also, Valentine's Day today -Yay! The boy and I are long distance at the moment because we go to different Universities, so we'll be buying ourselves chocolate and showing each other/eating it over Skype. I guess it may sound ridiculous to normal people, but I'm looking forward to it a lot. I know just what I want to get - there are these Kinder hippos with marshmallow at our local food court thing, so, yum! Not sure what's on the menu for tonight, but I'll try to make it reasonable.
Gwen
Monday, February 13, 2012
Normal Day 2
Weight: 109 lbs
They say it takes 21 days to form a habit. Does that mean 42 for intermittent fasting? I guess we'll see.
I have some goals that I'm trying to keep in mind with this. Making sure I get at least 10 minutes of physical activity (it's not a lot, but it's manageable) and 10 minutes of quiet time. See if I can keep it up?
5:24 PM: So far haven't been that hungry. A cup of cereal with a cup of milk, and a chicken tender with a handful of fries. I know, I'm the least healthy person on the face of the earth. Hopefully dinner will be better.
1:02 AM: Snaked because I was watching a diet show and got scared of malnutrition. Two clementines, yum. At dinner had an entire Subway footlong BLT for dinner. Rounds out to about 640 calories all together. Had about 1200 calories all together, which isn't terrible for a normal day. Quite tired and moody, but it's that time of the month so I doubt it has anything to do with fasting.
Goodnight, chickadees.
They say it takes 21 days to form a habit. Does that mean 42 for intermittent fasting? I guess we'll see.
I have some goals that I'm trying to keep in mind with this. Making sure I get at least 10 minutes of physical activity (it's not a lot, but it's manageable) and 10 minutes of quiet time. See if I can keep it up?
5:24 PM: So far haven't been that hungry. A cup of cereal with a cup of milk, and a chicken tender with a handful of fries. I know, I'm the least healthy person on the face of the earth. Hopefully dinner will be better.
1:02 AM: Snaked because I was watching a diet show and got scared of malnutrition. Two clementines, yum. At dinner had an entire Subway footlong BLT for dinner. Rounds out to about 640 calories all together. Had about 1200 calories all together, which isn't terrible for a normal day. Quite tired and moody, but it's that time of the month so I doubt it has anything to do with fasting.
Goodnight, chickadees.
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Alternate Day Fasting- Day 1 (kind of)
Weight: 112 lbs
So, it's been a while. . .
This blog just gives me some anxiety, so when I get overwhelmed, I put it on the shelf.
Well, I've decided to try alternate day fasting. My weight is not unmanageable right now, but I need the control, so here it is. Um, I read loads about it, and tried it briefly this summer, but I think I'll make it official now. Boy, would I love the health benefits of calorie restriction (and not just the weight loss.)
So, rules are that I have to fast for 24 hours, then a normal eating day for 24 hours. This will probably mean I'll have a small dinner on my fasting days and a normal amount of food on my "off" days. I stopped eating last night at 9PM, so I'm allowed to eat again at 9PM tonight. . .
It's 5:14 AM right now. Heehee, only an hour to go.
Also, sometimes I wish I were Amy Pond. Is that so wrong?
So, it's been a while. . .
This blog just gives me some anxiety, so when I get overwhelmed, I put it on the shelf.
Well, I've decided to try alternate day fasting. My weight is not unmanageable right now, but I need the control, so here it is. Um, I read loads about it, and tried it briefly this summer, but I think I'll make it official now. Boy, would I love the health benefits of calorie restriction (and not just the weight loss.)
So, rules are that I have to fast for 24 hours, then a normal eating day for 24 hours. This will probably mean I'll have a small dinner on my fasting days and a normal amount of food on my "off" days. I stopped eating last night at 9PM, so I'm allowed to eat again at 9PM tonight. . .
It's 5:14 AM right now. Heehee, only an hour to go.
Also, sometimes I wish I were Amy Pond. Is that so wrong?
6PM: Haven't actually felt that hungry today. 3 hours left and no hunger pains, which is weird. I got up late, though. About 3 hours ago, and I had some coffee with a splash of milk. (Is that cheating? I guess it's not really a fast if you have milk. . .)
8:47PM: Okay, I caved in and ate a little early. Bad me. I had a small salad to break the fast, with a tablespoon of blue cheese dressing. It was divine. Then I made myself a baked potato with bacon and 2 tablespoons of sour cream and some onions, but I was only able to eat half of it. Oops? Yay leftovers!
Monday, October 10, 2011
Been so long.
Sorry I haven't posted recently. College has been one hell of a trip so far, and while I have been concentrating on my weight, my anxiety has made itself known in less focused, productive ways and more "fuck getting out of bed today" kind of ways. I guess I don't really want to bitch too much, even though that's why I started writing this.
My weight has been fluctuating between 106 lbs - 107.5 lbs. Lower than I started. 12 more pounds until my goal weight. I noticed today that these jeans that have been tight since I bought them were really comfortable today. Maybe I've just stretched them out, though.
My mom is really on my case lately. I'm afraid my family may be falling apart. It makes me feel physically ill to think about, much less write about. I hope I'm not pregnant.
Oh, world. Please, please stay together long enough for me to learn to enjoy you.
Thanks,
Gwen.
My weight has been fluctuating between 106 lbs - 107.5 lbs. Lower than I started. 12 more pounds until my goal weight. I noticed today that these jeans that have been tight since I bought them were really comfortable today. Maybe I've just stretched them out, though.
My mom is really on my case lately. I'm afraid my family may be falling apart. It makes me feel physically ill to think about, much less write about. I hope I'm not pregnant.
Oh, world. Please, please stay together long enough for me to learn to enjoy you.
Thanks,
Gwen.
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
Not Listening Today, Chaucer Teacher
Full fathom five thy father lies
We read again and again. It's haunting, barely intelligible outside of the ivory tower. What should I do? I feel tempted to stray into intangibility, but that makes bad writing. I will not spell out my feelings in only words alone are seldom good.
Last night was hard for me. I am made of paradoxes.
Last night my heart beat fast in my chest. Do I enjoy this? Then I am a masochist.
Do I hate it? Then I cannot be enjoying life for that is painful joy and content banality, and should I chose the second then I am not living. Just existing.
My heart beat fast, regardless of my joy. It does now, and it's a light nauseating feeling. I am always pulsating with energy, sexual or sublimated, but always there if I am to feel anything. Last night I tried not to feel anything, but I have a weakness for this romantic sadness.
He laid his head on my chest. I have another, don't I? This should not be acceptable. I feel guilt, even though I am not obligated to. I still feel obligated. He is a romantic soul. He is fallen, too, from the Eden of first love. I have yet to fall, yet here I am, encouraged by Adam with the apple in my mouth. And I want it, even while I am trying not to vomit.
What do I need to feel loved? I have attention, and I have someone who needs me and yet I do not know. Do I need this head on my should? An absent but simultaneously affectionate figure. That is the bittersweet ache I desire. Pay attention, but only long enough to leave a trace of mild interest. Talk to me about your other love, far away. I do not envy her. She does not have you, either. Hell has you. She is your lover, and this lonely freezing death is your constant companion. The leviathan has eaten you. You caress me as a shadow of what you were.
I am not bitter. I want to stand back.
Yesterday I went for a walk to Mordor, the CVS that Joe and I named in a drunken revelry. I am breaking my body. Last week I burnt my chest making bacon, and after that walked two miles in too small shoes. I needed anti-bacterial cream and bandages for less than attractive festering sores. Moving gives me the feeling of progress, of change. It is a childish feeling of running away, and a thought that maybe, maybe this one time I won't be back. Instead, a life as a vagabond and doesn't that sound romantic? Who needs the rat race of college in Washington? It's got enough well-intentioned dolts.
I have had coffee and my facial twitches are starting. A trembling jaw, as though I am about to cry. A fist clenched because I want to lash out. No, wait, because I want to see the half-moon marks of red. The coffee made me feel sick this morning. I always know exactly what I have eaten. One waffle, a tablespoon of syrup. Dip, because it's easier and uses less syrup. Then the coffee. Well, I don't feel good, I don't want excess, I will not give in. My hunger feels like nausea. I just want to sleep, but oh this ache!
Numbers on the scale I can hardly read. 109.0. I will not be skeletal. I like no body type. Cover, cover my mistakes. Hello Kitty bandaids a the best. Much cuter than these festering accidents.
We read again and again. It's haunting, barely intelligible outside of the ivory tower. What should I do? I feel tempted to stray into intangibility, but that makes bad writing. I will not spell out my feelings in only words alone are seldom good.
Last night was hard for me. I am made of paradoxes.
Last night my heart beat fast in my chest. Do I enjoy this? Then I am a masochist.
Do I hate it? Then I cannot be enjoying life for that is painful joy and content banality, and should I chose the second then I am not living. Just existing.
My heart beat fast, regardless of my joy. It does now, and it's a light nauseating feeling. I am always pulsating with energy, sexual or sublimated, but always there if I am to feel anything. Last night I tried not to feel anything, but I have a weakness for this romantic sadness.
He laid his head on my chest. I have another, don't I? This should not be acceptable. I feel guilt, even though I am not obligated to. I still feel obligated. He is a romantic soul. He is fallen, too, from the Eden of first love. I have yet to fall, yet here I am, encouraged by Adam with the apple in my mouth. And I want it, even while I am trying not to vomit.
What do I need to feel loved? I have attention, and I have someone who needs me and yet I do not know. Do I need this head on my should? An absent but simultaneously affectionate figure. That is the bittersweet ache I desire. Pay attention, but only long enough to leave a trace of mild interest. Talk to me about your other love, far away. I do not envy her. She does not have you, either. Hell has you. She is your lover, and this lonely freezing death is your constant companion. The leviathan has eaten you. You caress me as a shadow of what you were.
I am not bitter. I want to stand back.
Yesterday I went for a walk to Mordor, the CVS that Joe and I named in a drunken revelry. I am breaking my body. Last week I burnt my chest making bacon, and after that walked two miles in too small shoes. I needed anti-bacterial cream and bandages for less than attractive festering sores. Moving gives me the feeling of progress, of change. It is a childish feeling of running away, and a thought that maybe, maybe this one time I won't be back. Instead, a life as a vagabond and doesn't that sound romantic? Who needs the rat race of college in Washington? It's got enough well-intentioned dolts.
I have had coffee and my facial twitches are starting. A trembling jaw, as though I am about to cry. A fist clenched because I want to lash out. No, wait, because I want to see the half-moon marks of red. The coffee made me feel sick this morning. I always know exactly what I have eaten. One waffle, a tablespoon of syrup. Dip, because it's easier and uses less syrup. Then the coffee. Well, I don't feel good, I don't want excess, I will not give in. My hunger feels like nausea. I just want to sleep, but oh this ache!
Numbers on the scale I can hardly read. 109.0. I will not be skeletal. I like no body type. Cover, cover my mistakes. Hello Kitty bandaids a the best. Much cuter than these festering accidents.
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